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The Taming of Chance

Chance
a play in two acts

G, a graduate student
Ian HACKING
CS PEIRCE
Emile DURKHEIM
Adolphe QUETELET
Francis GALTON
ZANDRA, a citizen of the UMS

Act One

The lights go up to reveal G and Zandra standing on an empty stage. An enormous normal curve looms behind them.


G

What?

ZANDRA

Do not be afraid.

G

Where am I? Who are you?

ZANDRA

I am a citizen of the Universal Metastate. This is what you are accustomed to call “the future”.

G

I was going…that is, I intended to…and now suddenly this is the future? How?

ZANDRA

Few are chosen for temporal reconstruction. You have been summoned for a
purpose. The others are already here.

G

Others?

ZANDRA

Of course.

CS Peirce, Emile Durkheim, Adolphe Quetelet, and Francis Galton step forward.

ZANDRA

Are there any more questions? Mr. Durkheim?

DURKHEIM

Why am I speaking English? Has the French tongue no employment in the alleged future?

ZANDRA

English? You are mistaken. We are speaking Unoglot, an artificial language constructed from many tongues.

DURKHEIM

It sounds like English.

PEIRCE

I agree with you.

ZANDRA

Unoglot’s vocabulary includes a certain proportion of words derived from the extinct language you call “English”.

HACKING

Name one that isn’t.

ZANDRA

Sometimes we say “manana” instead of “tomorrow”.

HACKING

Rhymes with “banana”?

ZANDRA

Silence! Behold the power of our technology!

A trolley wheels forward by itself. On it is a brick.

ZANDRA

brandishing a disintegration-ray gun

This is a disintegration-ray gun.

She disintegrates the brick. The trolley withdraws.

We of the End of History have reconstructed you for a panel discussion.

GALTON

producing a measuring tape from his pocket

Would it be possible to measure some of the citizens of the future? Perhaps before or, possibly, after the panel discussion?

QUETELET

A capital idea!

ZANDRA

Manana will be a busy day. Each of you will find a meal in his sleeping cubicle.

Lights down. They come up again briefly to reveal the six guest in separate boxes with cots.

ACT TWO

Lights up. Everyone except DURKHEIM is seated aroung a table.

ZANDRA

Good morning. Welcome to our panel discussion. Today’s discussion is titled “The Evolution of Statistical Thinking in the 19th Century.” Mr. Hacking’s book, Posted by Søren Renner on Monday, September 11, 2006 at 02:37 PM in
Comments (5) | Tell a friend

Comments:

1

Posted by Søren Renner on September 20, 2006, 09:30 PM | #

Who is Emmet Silverman?

2

Posted by Nick Tamiroff on September 21, 2006, 12:31 AM | #

AND yáll thought JJR WAS OFF THE WALL! Oysters and a good red would be appreciated about now.LOL Funny,my code entry is “ill” -how appropiate.

3

Posted by Al Ross on September 21, 2006, 02:05 AM | #

Emmet Silverman is chairman of the’ Rabbis for Osama’ movement and he is currently on a month-long recruitment drive in the Falkland Islands.

4

Posted by Guessedworker on September 21, 2006, 05:19 AM | #

Only West Falkland, surely.

Here’s Emmet - not, I presume, one of Soren’s mouse-persecuting cats - mildly critiquing race denier and husband and father to vibrancy, Frank McGowan, and Nigerian tribal EGI denier and pretentious International Man of Intellect, Abiola Lapite.

Em doesn’t sound like too bad a guy.  Of course, if Soren can elucidate ...

... Soren?

... Soren?

5

Posted by Søren Renner on September 23, 2006, 05:56 PM | #

GW, on the basis of this comment . . .

”  “The level of fixation on IQ is in inverse proportion to IQ”.

Not really. Look at Locke and Schopenhauer. On the other hand, Kant wasn’t very interested in the topic of human differences. Not that I hold any brief for Lynn and Vanhanen. Jensen, however, I will defend.”

. . .  you call the author a race denier? For supporting Jensen? Anyway, the comment could have been posted by anyone. The “real” E.S. still remains shrouded in the fog of History… but at least I provoked a few (meager and unsatisfying) comments at last. Probably you think that ES is a Jew, because of the name. Can you show me one scrap of evidence? (A certified letter from the mohel with attached biological evidence would prove it.)

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